Given the current Covid-19 restrictions, Nicola Sturgeon has stated that she will not be visiting her parents during the Christmas period in order to keep them safe and also to provide an example of stately leadership to Scotland. 

However, the real reason is that she doesn’t recall exactly where ‘North Ayrshire’ is anymore. The first minister went on to say, ‘Let me be frank with you. I left Irvine when I was 18, joined the SNP, and I have hardly been South of Paisley Gilmour Street or North of Bridge of Allan since that time. 

However, let me assure you that I’ve seen a lot of places from that little helicopter window during the last election campaign and that has been more than sufficient to give me a detailed understanding of Scottish geography’. 

‘So, what’s the bit of Scotland that has the oil? Aber, something or other? And then there are some islands at the top that sort of go round down the way. And then there’s the big river that used to make ships. And then there’s West Ayrshire. There is a West Ayrshire, right? Maybe it was South-West Ayrshire. I can never remember’. 

‘From that far up, Scotland just seems to be a lot of green, with some animals and small communities that I barely know. My parents may as well be living in Auckland for all the times I venture out of the Central Belt. This so-called “North Ayrshire” where they live may as well be a mythical place like Brigadoon, Atlantis or Shangri-La for all I believe in its existence. “North Ayrshire”. Yeah. Good one’

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MORNING NEWS – 22/01/21 – Covid vaccine: Centralised bottleneck to blame for SNP’s slow roll-out.
MORNING NEWS – 22/01/21 – Covid vaccine: Centralised bottleneck to blame for SNP’s slow roll-out.

https://reaction.life/covid-vaccine-centralised-bottleneck-to-blame-for-snps-slow-roll-out/?fbclid=IwAR3opIImXCYj7VVz7l2NlQX4gHETISDJnYgG8xhjTl5yOuohKMnKZJXhAG0 The SNP are failing the NHS as …

[PLEASE NOTE THIS IS A WORK OF SATIRE AND DOES NOT REPRESENT THE VIEWS OF SCOTLAND MATTERS]

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