The SNP To Start Selling Branded Coffins

Due to the highly successful and uncontroversial release of their facemasks, the SNP have decided to start selling their own brand of unique coffins. Available in ‘canary yellow’, ‘Yes Saltire blue…[CLICK HERE TO READ MORE]

Face Masks Now Mandatory At Sturgeon’s Press Conferences

Due to the unprecedented volume of hot air being exhaled by Nicola Sturgeon at her ‘Covid Conferences’, all those in attendance have been advised to wear a facemask when they are in close proximity to the First Minister. Professor of Political Bullshit at St Andrew’s University, Harley Gillies, said that…[CLICK HERE TO READ MORE]

Birthday Messages For Our Dear Leader

Greetings Scottish Citizens. As you know our Great Leader recently celebrated her 50th birthday with a clap from the grateful populace, a salute from the ‘Scottish Resistance’ and a socially distanced ‘sair elba’ tap from her predecessor. Click here to see the top 20 most joyous exaltations chosen by the official state newspaper, The National out of 800 beautifully crafted birthday wishes  Happy birthday ma’am!

The Scottish Resistance To Organise Hot Tub Sit-In Protest

Fresh from valiantly manning the Scottish/English border where their noble, eternal and deathless (Well, 5 hours) vigil to defend Scotland from suspected Covid-19 infested English tourists was met with…[CLICK HERE TO READ MORE]

New Scottish Border Patrol Force In Action At Gretna

First Minister, Nicola Sturgeon, has inaugurated Scotlands first border patrol force today at a ceremony near Gretna. The ‘Alba Rapid Security Enforcement’ or A.R.S.E…

‘Big Support’ For SNP In Irvine

The ‘CunninghameSouth SNP’ Twitter account is stretching the bounds of credulity and logic with their claim of ‘Big support’ in Irvine on the 23rd of November…

Nationalist Angry At Cheese

You have just spotted the ‘Butchers Apron’, the union jack, the flag of the ‘Wastemonster’ elite on the cheese and you’re a Scottish nationalist, the worst kind. You’ve spent years boycotting products associated with the UK, dreaming you’re part of an oppressed minority…

New Nationalist TV Channel Launched

Given the roaring success that is BBC Scotland (audience share 0.11% ), the separatists have decided to launch their own satellite TV service…

New Name For ‘No’ Voter Discovered By Scottish Separatist

So, you voted ‘No’ in 2014. You’ve probably been called a ‘Tory’, even though you may never have voted Conservative in your life and perhaps never would. Chances are, you’ve been called a ‘Quisling’…

Where’s Swinney?

Those of you who grew up in the ’90s or were parents during the same period probably remember the ‘Where’s Wally’ series of books. Wally could be in Egypt, ancient Rome, modern London; who knows where he would end up!…

Extreme Separatists Try New Tactic Of Being Aggressive And Blaming The English

In a revolutionary new attempt to sway ‘No’ voters from 2014, the fringe of the Scottish separatist movement is to now blame the English and Tories for all of Scotland ills…

Wee Ginger Dug In Another Startling Anti-tory, Pro-SNP, Anti-UK, Pro-oor Nicola, Anti-Union Article

The infamous separatist blogger the ‘Wee Ginger Dug’ has recently published another predictable article on their blog. You’re a busy person. You have stuff to do, unlike bloggers. So, here is the synopsis …

Former First Minister Makes Dramatic Intervention in Cineworld Robert the Bruce No-show Scandal

Welcome to Scotland in 2019. A nation where our former First Minister now interferes in a ‘Twitterstorm’ over a film about Robert the Bruce that an independent cinema chain doesn’t wish to show at its cinemas that only has a 40% rating on Rotten Tomatoes because nationalism.

Alex Salmond urges Cineworld to ‘think again’ and screen Robert the Bruce epic in Scotland

Alex Salmond has urged Cineworld chiefs to reconsider their decision not show the new Robert the Bruce biopic in Scotland. The former First Minister joins a growing number of people venting their disappointment as it emerged that the cinema chain – the UK’s largest by number of venues – would not be screening the historical epic starring Angus Macfadyen in Scotland.

Yet Another Indy Crowdfunding Surprises Absolutely No One

A lone Scottish separatist has decided yet again to set up another Crowdfunding campaign to ‘draw in fence sitters and soft no voters’ for our 8th ‘ Rough Wooing’ since the end of September 2014. This time it’s different though! This time it’s to prevent Scotland from being ‘held prisoner by the British State’ in the event of a no-deal Brexit explains the text that has been copied and pasted from every other unsuccessful separatist crowdfunding campaign that has ever existed previously.

Robert the Bruce writes for The National

Here, actor Angus Macfadyen miraculously channels the wisdom of King Robert the Bruce from beyond the grave in an unmatched feat of clairvoyance that only the power of writing for The National could imbue him with.

Robert the Bruce: Familiar sound of Empire must be fiercely opposed

AHEAD of the release of his new film, Robert the Bruce (at cinemas nationwide from June 28), Angus Macfadyen imagines what the iconic Scottish leader would think if he woke up to today’s world of politics. MY heart bleeds. I woke up this morning in the future.

SNP Tour from the SSE Hydro in 2014

Below, you will find a video of an SNP conference/event hybrid from 2014 that would have been utterly alien to Scotland before 2007. Guest appearances include such musical luminaries as Blank Canvas and a rapper called Stanley Odd. Nicola Sturgeon and Alex Salmond have walk on parts.

So you don’t have to watch the entire spectacle, go to 2:03:00 to see a man waxing lyrical about “I don’t know, but I didn’t vote No!”, “When I say bed tax, you say nae chance!” and that “British values need a respirator!”. How often can you say that you witnessed the exact moment your nation lost its sense of perspective?